bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
