how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
