only you would photoshop your dick
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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