He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
