I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
