i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Randomize
