So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
