and i looked up. we had an audience...
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
