Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
