i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
