In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
