WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
