if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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