SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
