He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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