Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
