Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I wear drunk well.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
