this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
