i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize