We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
