enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
So much Jack, so little girl.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
