So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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