So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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