we have officially lost it.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
