Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Randomize
