I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
