Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
