You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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