do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
