I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
