I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Who died my cat blue again?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
