WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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