If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
