Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
