If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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