You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
