I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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