He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I have already put on my inside pants.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
