Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
