tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
