I wanna passion pit in your ass
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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