Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
