My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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