So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
