Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
