Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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