yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
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