This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
