yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
