You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
